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I am not really sure how to summarize what I am experiencing or what it even is, so I guess I will start from the beginning. A few days ago on April 17th I was experiencing health anxiety related to chest pain when I laugh and breath super heavily. I was at my girlfriends house this night who I love with all my heart and I decided to try some weed edibles for like the second time in my life. I believe I took more then I should have (it was probably close to one whole edible like 40mg?) and I ended up having a pretty bad panic attack and was able to calm down after about 20 minuets. Not long after I calmed down I got pretty bad harmful thoughts that appeared in my mind about stabbing my girlfriend, this caused my head to have like a severe cold sensation is the best way I can explain this. Now ever since this day I keep fixating on this intrusive thought and its giving me severe anxiety throughout my whole body and I even result to looking up stuff on the internet related to this stuff for reassurance. I have a hard time enjoying time with my girlfriend now because of these thoughts and anxiety and its literally tearing me to pieces. Tomorrow I have an appointment with my doctor regarding all of this. I hope this was an okay place to share this, I am just not sure how I went from being such as happy person to this anxiety filled crazy person. I don't remember a time where I have felt this low and I am not sure what to do. I feel like this was almost my last hope and any advice or thoughts on this post will be appreciated. I wish everyone here well in this life!
@gcarson123 Glad the meds are helping. Let us know what happens after you come off this medicine. Hopefully they won't come back. There is a very good video on YouTube that I recommend you watch. It is located here.
Well, here is an update as of 5/21/2024. I didn't think things could get worse, but my girlfriend broke up with me saying she lost feelings and sees me more as friend. Before this happened obsessive thoughts came back along with the anxiety, but this time it is centered around guilt of a pretty terrible mistake and decision I made around a year ago. These thoughts along with the breakup has put me in a pretty dark place mentally. I am doing my best to overcome all of this and I appreciate all of your help. I do want to add that I seem to be seeing the number 333 more then usual and I also had a strange occurrence of a bird hitting my windshield while driving and almost another one a couple days later. Not sure if this has any significance? Love you all
@robinrais Perhaps the thoughts will come back if I come off this medicine and don't work on what is happening?
Its not the thoughts that are the issue but our reaction to them. The more attachment we have to them, the more power they have over the mind.
Like when a pond is disturbed, its sediment clouds our view.
Rest in natural great peace and return to your true nature.
Most likely it would come back, bc you have an entity attachment, as the above people explained. When you don't remove that, it remains attached and siphoning off of you like an energetic parasite. The medication shuts down your pineal gland and 3rd eye so that you are no longer able to hear the intrusive thoughts from the entity but it is still there, it's essentially a chemical block or chemical blinders. But that thing will still suck from you, draining you of energy, causing physical ailments and depending on the type of entity attachment, may even have influence over things you do. As is typical with most western medicine, they treat the symptoms and not the cause so as to keep you perpetually coming back as a patient ans locked forever into needing their doctor visits, med management visits and monthly prescription refills, for the rest of your life. Only you can choose to release yourself from this cycle as you create your own reality. Easier said than done, I know!
I too am going through a really bad bout of anxiety. It has been a full week of panic so far and I am on Sertaline already. It is really disrupting my entire life and focus and ability to be there for my son. I am so exhausted and anxious and it's making me lose all my faith. 🙁