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I feel like I'm going to explode. I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend/companion for almost 15 years. We both have medical issues and basically live together out of convenience. He doesn't talk, communicate or share feelings, EVER.
In the past couple of years he has become obsessed with guns. He spends 80% of his time while at home watching gun videos, cleaning his guns and shooting them. I am not against self defense but this has become his only interest. I feel so alone and suffer PTSD from my ex husband who tried to kill me. He doesn't seem to understand how difficult it is for me to be around all this negative energy as I'm also an empath. He's not spiritually awake at all. I can't leave due to my medical conditions and lack of funds. He talked me into moving where we are now about 10 years ago which removed every friend from my life. I literally sit on my couch with nothing to do while he plays soldier boy. Recently he built a couple of ghost guns for a friend who is not allowed to own a firearm. I spoke up about it and now he keeps everything secret from me. I would flee if it wasn't for my 2 dogs and 2 cats (the only family I have).
Any ideas or suggestions? I'm better than this and deserve better treatment and communication.
My ex wife did this. She took issue with all of my friends and family. She convinced me they were all bad influences. She came into my life as a spiritual teacher. And during the divorce I was psychoglocally evaluated as a "battered housewife". My self esteem came from her and her family. I felt she always had my best interest in mind.
We had 2 children and she had one before me. We had a $500k divorce and afterword over the children (each $250k). I was a programmer who one night forgot how. Terrifying. I was accused of molesting my first born and had to go into supervised visitation. I lost everything. Homeless. All of my attachments.
How does that happen?
It was my dark night of the soul. At 35, after 10 years, I discovered a course in miracles and then my life radically changed .
What was really going on is my ex wife was feeding off of my energy. I am powerful and she knew it but didn't want me to know it. We did love each other but in a past life we were mortal enemies. In this life we were to get together to heal and to awaken each other. Kind of like the pressure needed to forge a diamond. That relationship served me well. Thank you Cloe.
I feel like I'm going to explode. I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend/companion for almost 15 years. We both have medical issues and basically live together out of convenience. He doesn't talk, communicate or share feelings, EVER.
In the past couple of years he has become obsessed with guns. He spends 80% of his time while at home watching gun videos, cleaning his guns and shooting them. I am not against self defense but this has become his only interest. I feel so alone and suffer PTSD from my ex husband who tried to kill me. He doesn't seem to understand how difficult it is for me to be around all this negative energy as I'm also an empath. He's not spiritually awake at all. I can't leave due to my medical conditions and lack of funds. He talked me into moving where we are now about 10 years ago which removed every friend from my life. I literally sit on my couch with nothing to do while he plays soldier boy. Recently he built a couple of ghost guns for a friend who is not allowed to own a firearm. I spoke up about it and now he keeps everything secret from me. I would flee if it wasn't for my 2 dogs and 2 cats (the only family I have).
Any ideas or suggestions? I'm better than this and deserve better treatment and communication.
The Planet is going to be Accelerating into a very fast paced action packed Ascension starting in 2025. 3d terrestrial "matrix muggles" are going to hate it and feel the humiliation of themselves as they are left in the dust against the people who are moving up and with this abundant new Reality.
Here's what you do. Eat as HEALTHY as possible. Spend your time online watching the Fall of the Cabal and the Liberation of the Planet - you can watch it all online. It's a great time to "Enjoy the Show" as Your Own Personal Rewarding Uplifting Activity.
@nolongerignorant2012 Thank you for sharing your story here. This is the time indeed to clear all kharma. Take care of yourself and keep feeding your children with Unconditional Love ❤️
I feel like you are not letting things fall apart. Holding onto a marriage that doesn't serve you
We are in the Ascension period. The universe will no longer let you do that.
If a person or relationship is actively blocking your Ascension, it needs to be transformed or removed. There is no time left.
Thank it for the lessons it gave you and take back your power.
Namaste
I feel like I'm going to explode. I've been in a relationship with my boyfriend/companion for almost 15 years. We both have medical issues and basically live together out of convenience. He doesn't talk, communicate or share feelings, EVER.
In the past couple of years he has become obsessed with guns. He spends 80% of his time while at home watching gun videos, cleaning his guns and shooting them. I am not against self defense but this has become his only interest. I feel so alone and suffer PTSD from my ex husband who tried to kill me. He doesn't seem to understand how difficult it is for me to be around all this negative energy as I'm also an empath. He's not spiritually awake at all. I can't leave due to my medical conditions and lack of funds. He talked me into moving where we are now about 10 years ago which removed every friend from my life. I literally sit on my couch with nothing to do while he plays soldier boy. Recently he built a couple of ghost guns for a friend who is not allowed to own a firearm. I spoke up about it and now he keeps everything secret from me. I would flee if it wasn't for my 2 dogs and 2 cats (the only family I have).
Any ideas or suggestions? I'm better than this and deserve better treatment and communication.
Became obsessed with guns? Sounds like my kind of guy!!! 😆
Nothing wrong with firearms, they are objects. It's prudent to be concerned with one's self defense, but as you noted, they can also be a hobby / recreation. One shouldn't get too obsessed over any object, but it's ok to be a fan of things and have hobbies. His hobby is firearms now, that's perfectly fine. You are allowed to have hobbies that he is no into as well. Sometimes people go through phases where they get really into one specific thing. It could be gardening, or cooking, or photography, or martial arts / the gym. Sometimes these obsessions linger sometimes they fade. He is having his human experience which is calling this into his life for some reason (Bashaar always says chase your highest passion at the moment) and you shouldn't judge it.
It concerns me when you say "spoke up about it"? I don't know what that means, but I wouldn't discuss any illegal or quasi legal activity on here. If you were threatening to rat him out over something that was quasi legal (could be anything, weed isn't legal in my state) I would understand his concern at not being able to trust you. IF you just wanted to have a frank conversation about it, then that's different. But you most likely shouldn't share activities that you are not sure are legal or not on a public forum, so that in itself is a violation of trust.
My ex wife did this. She took issue with all of my friends and family. She convinced me they were all bad influences. She came into my life as a spiritual teacher. And during the divorce I was psychoglocally evaluated as a "battered housewife". My self esteem came from her and her family. I felt she always had my best interest in mind.
We had 2 children and she had one before me. We had a $500k divorce and afterword over the children (each $250k). I was a programmer who one night forgot how. Terrifying. I was accused of molesting my first born and had to go into supervised visitation. I lost everything. Homeless. All of my attachments.
How does that happen?
It was my dark night of the soul. At 35, after 10 years, I discovered a course in miracles and then my life radically changed .
What was really going on is my ex wife was feeding off of my energy. I am powerful and she knew it but didn't want me to know it. We did love each other but in a past life we were mortal enemies. In this life we were to get together to heal and to awaken each other. Kind of like the pressure needed to forge a diamond. That relationship served me well. Thank you Cloe.
It's called "toxic femininity" which is in actuality a lot more dangerous and damaging than so called "toxic masculinity". So many men have had their lives destroyed over the simple hatful untrue alligation of an angry or bitter woman. These women are then never held accountable by the courts or legal system, even after their lies are exposed. In the meantime, the man's lives and reputations are destroyed and ruined (sometimes forever). I know first hand, as it happened to me also. Some of these women do it multiple times to multiple men with no consequences. They are very sick and evil beings.
EA just did a interview where she said that the most judgemental people she EVER encountered were other mothers (or Karens) who judge and try to control other mother's behavior.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ujnl1A192u0
@nolongerignorant2012 thank you for sharing this. Beautifully written
Thanks you. I am glad you got something out of it. It's been quite a journey. I'm 50 now.
Thanks you. I am glad you got something out of it. It's been quite a journey. I'm 50 now.
Happy Birthday - Thank You for your perspectives, I found them valuable
I want to take your question to a deeper level.
We are intertwined through quantum entanglement with gods and godesses in the 10 dimensions of reality.
So in the 5th dimension (Pan), my soul was connected with the energy of the great white wizard of Pan and my ex was connected to the dark wizard of Pan. We had a soul contract and we're actively in each other's lives for 10 years. You know the rest of the story.
It's important to understand your oversoul, all of your lifetimes, if it has a bearing on your life today.
We teach this in my church, the Church of the Sovereign Earth. https://odysee.com/@nolongerignorant:0/Heal_Yourself_Know_Yourself_Love_Yourself_Heal_Gaia_Sophia_the_Earth:1
The story of the fall of Pan (the 5th dimension) is documented in the book Right Use of Will.
What I'm trying to say the roots of your current conflict may not be from this dimension.
I wish you well in this process of finding yourself. It will help Gaia Sophia when you do. 🙂
Here are some great teachers of our age in addition to Elizabeth April: youtube kerryk, Aaron akbe
My instincts tell me that he may be reliving a past life where his life was threatened. His fear exhumes in grayish aura colors. I feel his fear and must constantly protect my energy field from his.
That's about the starting age of most people in my course in miracles class! I'm the young one.
I'm in Kerrys plasma light tribe and acim. I started a church because the cosmology i was receiving wasn't like anywhere else. It described the dream of perceived separation from God ACIM talks about but it's definitely definitely a work in progress.
If there's one thing you learn is that you know nothing compared to what there is to know. You just hazard a guess that looks like it fits the pieces together. And then you change it as new info becomes available.
Science and the scientific method is supposed to work that way.
Hopefully your learning all the way and most of all learning not to judge or at least being aware of yourself when you do.
Who knows you may find people who want to join you on that journey